I'm not sure what's changed, if anything, but I'm feeling damn good these days. A sense of peace has settled in and I'm extremely content with how things are going. Now, of course, there are things in the works. Feeling at peace doesn't = complacency, remaining stagnant, etc. But I'm just feeling overall happy about how things are going, where I'm at, and where I'm headed. Did the Tres Burritos ride today and fully expected it to suck. It didn't. Not at all. I rode out with a group faster than I'd ride on my own, but not craziness. That seemed to spur either 1) my competitive side (don't think so, not w/cycling), or 2) kicked me into gear (yes, yes) and while I kicked back a bit after riding w/them the first 20, a couple of the guys waited up and we continued to ride at a pace a bit above what I'd prefer given the overall distance. I kept thinking I was going to pay for it once we did the huge jaunt back south into the wind. Instead, I ended up dropping the guy w/the South Australia jersey (oops.. seriously unintentional... he apparently fell off on one of the hills) and then the last 10 I was the one leading a slew of guys into the wind. Me. ME!!! I felt strong and don't know what to chalk this up to. 67 miles is farther than I *should* have been biking today, though apparently my body & mind disagree with whatever was saying it's too much. I did some 60+ rides prior to Mexico, but just short rides here and then since I've been back. Something culminated and THANK YOU! I'm tickled. I also am aware to not put too much stock in this... sometimes it's just all right at the same time. I still have a lot of training to do to have a strong 100 for the Mamma Jamma.
Touch. Oh, touch. I treated myself to a massage tonight. I've yet to figure out what is most pleasing to me about this. Yes, I DO love a massage. But I also love love love being touched. Sexually is great, but some of us are w/o partner so clearly I don't mean in that way about this. It just feel so frickin' good to have someone's hands on my body. Amazing. Similar to a hug. Huge fan of the hug and dammit, why do so many people suck at hugging? Is it that hard? Apparently. I feel like I"m hugging a robot 1/2 the time. I get not everyone is in touch with their emotions, not comfortable opening themselves up, but it's just a hug. Then again, ahem... we know *just a hug* is what sparked a very torrid relationship not too long ago so perhaps I'm not giving it enough credit. Either way, I'm happy.
I'd love to meet someone. I do want a partner in my life. But timing is so very critical and eventually I feel confident the right person will be there at the right time. It's all good. Right now. I'm feeling antsy. Not so much about this partner thang... just a bit antsy in general. There are thoughts brewing in my mind. Where I want to be. Goodness. Total goodness. It's about time. ;-))))))))))))